~ Congrats to the Bulls ~

The University of Buffalo traveled to Michigan to play Ball State, who was ranked #12 in the nation, for the MAC Championship. The Bulls, unranked themselves, were surely the underdog. It was the first time in the schools history they played for the championship. I was thrilled it was on ESPN last night and actually watched a good chunk of it. The boys were on a mission and the defense stood tall causing 4 turnovers. The final score, Buffalo 42- Ball St 24. Congrats boys on a job well done!!

The Bulls have also been invited to a bowl game for only the second time in 94 years of college football. It will be the first time they accept. Back in 1958 the Bulls were invited to play in the Tangerine Bowl against Florida State but turned down the invitation when it was made known that two of the Bulls players who were African-American would not be allowed to compete.
Whuuu huuuu lets go Bulls! At least we have something to look forward to here. The Bills are sucking wind and will no doubt miss the playoffs after a tremendous start of 4-0. The Sabres? Oh my boys.. not sure what the hell is happening there but it's painful to watch. No worries I'm watching 'em but it is painful.

~ Tag Request - First Snow ~

I need an email address if you request a tag see note below

****PLEASE READ****

This is very important. Unlike AOL blogger does not give me an email when I receive your comment alert. I never saved addresses in AOL, so I don't have them, or I have no idea who you are as I don't see your AOL username. I must have an email address when you request a tag. If I don't, your request will be ignored. You can make it really easy and go to your blogger profile and include an email address. It's real easy when you log in you have the option to view your profile or you can view your entire profile from your journal. Edit your profile and add an email. AOL or other it doesn't matter. If you don't want to do that you must leave your address in the comment each time you make a request

Expires 12/7 at noon EST

any requests after that time or without an email will be ignored.

If you'd like your name on this please leave a comment letting me know. Please make sure I get your email address.Do not alter tags No resizing, stopping animation, cutting or ripping to add your name, signature, or any other text. If you need help with animation on your blog let me know I will give you directions.

Limit 1

Graphics are to be used for personal use only. They are not to be used for advertisements or for profit. Thank you for following these terms.

hugs

~d

~ Will it Ever End ~

::sigh:: So I woke up this morning and examined myself in front of the mirror.  No itching and no additional hives, welts, or spots.  Good deal.  I smiled as I remember I was going out for a bit with my son before he had to go to work.  Maybe a little shopping, maybe a little picture taking.  I had a spring in my step.

I went and tested my sugar.  I know the routine of my sugars lately with the steroids.  High, high.  Two booster insulin shots, and then it levels out.  Before bed it goes high again.   The start of the day was no different.  Gave myself the booster, took my meds, ate breakfast and started to read some journals and mail as I sipped on my coffee.  It wasn't long into the morning that my phone rang.  It came up restricted.  Hmmmmm  I answered and it was my primary Dr.  Must be calling from his private office line. 

So, he got the results from the doppler tests I had done on the Friday after Thanksgiving.  The one that registers blood clots came back good.  No issues.  The other one.  Well, I wasn't so lucky.  I have serious issues in both legs.  He set an appointment for me to go to a vascular surgeon.  My appointment is on Tuesday evening.  Looks like I will be scheduled for an angiogram and depending on the results stents could be put in my legs to open up the circulation.  If that happens I will most likely be kept over night.  When I asked if it was nerve damage instead what would be the next step he replied with, 'we'll address that if it comes to that.'   I had a brave face and voice with the Dr but inside I was losing control. 

I hung up and broke down in tears.  Why is it 3 steps forward 7 back?  I feel like I can't get better and with each thing I get the worse case scenario.  I was in tears and sobbing talking to my son as I canceled our plans.  I was in no mood to get dressed let along go out.  He reminded me if it was in fact the worst case scenario I would not be here.  Smart boy, ok young man.  It's just so hard to feel so good and look forward to getting better only to have such a road block thrown up. 

I'm scared of this.  I know I have numbness etc in my left foot, but don't feel any issues in my right leg or foot at all.  How could this all happen in such a short span.  My Dr feels that maybe I'd have the diabetes for awhile with no notice of it.  It's not uncommon he said.   I haven't had that kind of blood work in awhile.  Not to test sugars I guess.  ::shrugging::  You know I will be paying much more attention these days.  I just fear it's going to be nerve damage and then amputation, then...........  

I can't get that fear out of my  head.  The fear of how much disability I will be on, for how long.   I know my health comes first and I will do nothing to keep me from getting healthy.  Just hard to think past all the other issues that arise.  Makes me wonder how long will this go on, how many more things will be found?

I want to clarify that my Drs are great.  I know previous entries may have eluded to them not being.  I am a 'want answers now' type person.  Patience is not one of my best characteristics.  I want it now.  Ya know?  I have gone to the internet and some forums but I've decided that answers and information there just send my head into a tizzy and I get the worst possible outcomes causing me to freak more.  I will just take it step by step, day by day.  I will try to be positive and move forward.   I can't change the direction anyway.

Is it easy?  Hell know.  I've cried several times today.  My son stopped over a bit after our call to make sure I was ok and let me tell you a hug goes a long way.

He has to work a bit in the morning tomorrow but he will be coming after work and we will go out.  A little shopping and maybe some pictures.  We've been getting some snow today so hopefully the trees will be covered in white and I can relax behind the camera.  Have at least something feel like 'my life.'

So........... everyone heard the verdict and sentencing on OJ I'm sure.  I don't want to get into if I think he was guilty 13 years ago or not.  I just find it hard to believe that child molesters are getting less time then he is for this offense.  Does he belong in jail, well of course (my humble opinion) but you are telling me the sentence of up to 33 years and min of 9 years does not have something to do with paying back for the acquittal 13 years ago when sex offenders are getting max of 2 years?   They say what goes around comes around...  but is this how our judicial system is suppose to work?  K.. 'nuff on that.

I've gotten way behind on blogs.  Damn I looked before doing this entry and I have over 150 to get to.   I will make my rounds this evening and tomorrow morning.   I hope everyone is doing well.   I do want to thank you all for the support, good wishes, and friendship you've all showed me ............

Hugs

~d

~ Tag Request - Waiting for Santa ~

I need an email address if you request a tag see note below

****PLEASE READ****

This is very important. Unlike AOL blogger does not give me an email when I receive your comment alert. I never saved addresses in AOL, so I don't have them, or I have no idea who you are as I don't see your AOL username. I must have an email address when you request a tag. If I don't, your request will be ignored. You can make it really easy and go to your blogger profile and include an email address. It's real easy when you log in you have the option to view your profile or you can view your entire profile from your journal. Edit your profile and add an email. AOL or other it doesn't matter. If you don't want to do that you must leave your address in the comment each time you make a request

Expires 12/6 at noon EST

any requests after that time or without an email will be ignored.
If you'd like your name on this please leave a comment letting me know. Please make sure I get your email address.Do not alter tags No resizing, stopping animation, cutting or ripping to add your name, signature, or any other text. If you need help with animation on your blog let me know I will give you directions.

Limit 1


Graphics are to be used for personal use only. They are not to be used for advertisements or for profit. Thank you for following these terms.
hugs
~d

~ Better ~

Yeah, yesterday at the cardiologist went well.  Not sure I was thrilled with seeing the Nurse Practioner, but what can I do.  They did an EKG which was fine, we went over other test results from the past.  Talked about how I was doing and my emotions.  Kind of different, not knowing how to feel or what to expect.  I still get emotional because I'm not sure what that twitch is, what that pain, why does that feel different, what's that burning sensation.  It gets overwhelming.  Again, I'm told it's normal, but to me it is not normal.  It is so far from normal it isn't funny.  No control over things and no straight up explanations for things I want to know about.   Ok, nuff feeling sorry for me.  We went over the reaction to the meds and because 2 are directly related to my heart, the healing and/or beating of it they put me back on the Lisinipril and Amiodarone.  Ok, so I tell her that the Lisinipril definitely makes me sleepy after I take it and it was scheduled to be taken at 11am.  'Take it before you go to bed.'  Ok, that sounds good.  I started that back up before I went to bed last night.  Amiodarone I took this morning with the other morning meds.  

I slept in today until 9:45.  Wow!  Not something I do often and lately I've been up before 6.  And Bill... I am going to bed early in comparison to what I use to do :)~   So I get up and go to the restroom.  I lift my nightgown to check the hive sites.  Call me paranoid.  Anyway, there on my belly are two fresh red welts.  Ok, what's up with that?   I feel great, sound good, and according to those that see me look wonderful.  Why can't I just heal and get back to things?  Something normal?   I call the Dr's office and discuss my findings.  They requested that I take the Lisinipril again tonight.  I've concluded that to be the culprit as the new welts arrived prior to taking the other.  They explain to me it could be something that was still 'in' my system and not be a 'new' reaction.  Ok, it's not itchy like it was in the past so I will give them the benefit of the doubt.   I've been checking regularly and really don't have an itch sooooooooooooooooooo   maybe it's paranoia after all.  Keep your fingers crossed that I wake up tomorrow with no welts, no new marks, and no itch.  That would make me extremely happy.   I don't want to cry again.....

I did go out to dinner tonight.  I had a gift certificate for a place and I had forgotten all about it.  Earlier in the week my brother mentioned he had one for the same place and it would be expiring soon.  Hmmmm  ding ding.. I remembered mine.  We decided to all go together.  OMG!  I'd never been to this place but the food was amazing and the serving size huge.  I've got enough for another meal :)  Yeah!!!

Anyone else having issues here?  Not sure if it's me or what.  Dashboard didn't want to open, it was difficult getting the new entry option to open, google reader was as slow and shit, and I tried to send my tag requests out and it would look to go then when it was all done I'd get an error, upload aborted.  Hmmm by who?   LOL  Anyway I tried a couple times and same thing.  Then in my sent mail was the mail.  Soooooooo I have no idea if they went at all or if they went numerous times.  If you didn't get it let me know... if you got it more then once forgive me.  GRRRRRRRRRRR   me thinks it's AOL and not blogger at all...  just thought I'd ask if anyone else had issues.  

Ok, off to climb in bed and watch the news.  Hope everyone is doing great.

Hugs

~d

~ Tag Request - She thinks I'm Cute ~

I need an email address if you request a tag see note below
****PLEASE READ****
This is very important. Unlike AOL blogger does not give me an email when I receive your comment alert. I never saved addresses in AOL, so I don't have them, or I have no idea who you are as I don't see your AOL username. I must have an email address when you request a tag. If I don't, your request will be ignored. You can make it really easy and go to your blogger profile and include an email address. It's real easy when you log in you have the option to view your profile or you can view your entire profile from your journal. Edit your profile and add an email. AOL or other it doesn't matter. If you don't want to do that you must leave your address in the comment each time you make a request

Expires 12/4 at noon EST

any requests after that time or without an email will be ignored.

If you'd like your name on this please leave a comment letting me know. Please make sure I get your email address.Do not alter tags No resizing, stopping animation, cutting or ripping to add your name, signature, or any other text. If you need help with animation on your blog let me know I will give you directions.

Limit 1

Graphics are to be used for personal use only. They are not to be used for advertisements or for profit. Thank you for following these terms.

hugs

~d

~ Hives ~

... and I'm not talking bee hives. I went to bed a little later then the norm on Sunday because I had to go for blood work in the am. My appointment wasn't until 9:40 and I had to fast, so I thought going to bed a bit later would allow me to sleep in a bit and forget that I couldn't eat or have coffee. Well............

That did not work. About 6 am I woke to the feeling of my skin crawling. I itched every where and it was a gazillion times worse then when I went to bed and this time it was all over. I went in to the bathroom and nearly screamed at what I saw in the mirror. My right eye lid was red and swollen almost shut. Both my ears were swollen, red, and hot. Can you say Dumbo? I lifted my nightgown to find red welts the size of dimes up to the size of softballs on my tummy, around my waste line, bra line, you name it. I was definitely having a reaction but to what? I immediately called my primary Dr and left a very detailed message with the answering service. With all the meds I am on I wasn't sure what I could take, Benadryl and option? Or what the hell was causing it. Nothing had changed.. not soap, laundry soap, body creme, foods I'd been eating. The meds I was on I've been taking for a month. Is it possible to have a reaction so far after the start of them?

Apparently so. The Dr returned my call and told me to take the benadryl and come to his office with my meds as soon as I was done getting my blood work done. I took the benadryl and went back to bed. I was woken by son arriving to take me for the blood work. Let me tell you he was not one bit happy with me. He scolded me for not calling and telling him. Instead I took the benedryl and fell asleep. Home alone as my sister had gone to work. 'What if something happened? I'd have no clue. You HAVE to call me with these things.' I know he was right and I apologized. He hugged me and off we went for the blood work and Dr appointment.

My Dr did not make me wait long and in I went to the examining room. There were more welts and they had gotten a lot redder. He knew exactly the three meds I was on that could cause it. The only thing he wasn't sure of was which one. He took me off all three. Amiodarone, Plavix, and Lisinipril. Yes, if you know these drugs you know a couple have to do with the regulation of my heart beat. He was confident that my cardiologist would be taking me off two tomorrow when I go, so he was confident in the decision and told me so. He also prescribed Methylprednisolone (a steroid) for the reaction. He did warn me this would make my sugar readings go up too. Great! Just what I need, one more thing.

Off to get the prescriptions filled, get home to have lunch and off to the diabetic Dr. That appointment was a long one. I met with the Nurse Practioner first then the Dr. Both were happy with the sugar readings I've had since being home from the hospital. Not sure if I mentioned this before but if my reading goes above 150 I need a booster shot before I eat. At bedtime I take insulin regardless of my reading. Never a booster at night with that one. I've only needed a couple boosters in the 3 weeks I've been home and that is good, but levels are still a bit high. Good but high. It doesn't appear this will be temporary and I will most likely be giving myself insulin every day. They did agree with my Dr and told me not to freak out with the sugar readings. Just give myself a booster when needed and go forward. The steroid pack I got starts out extremely high and then each day the dosage goes down. Thus my sugar should come back down too. If it doesn't I need to call, but today, already, it has come down a bit so I think I'm good to go. ::knocking on wood:: I need to get a break, don't ya think?

Regarding my foot. She is not ready to declare it is neurothopy, but rather will wait for the results of my recent doppler tests. If she feels the need she will do some nerve testing to get a better idea. Neurothopy is common in diabetics and causes the numbness and tingling sensation. It is not reversible, but we can slow it down. I shed a tear or two at that point. I've often read of amputations etc. She informed me it wasn't the neurothopy that causes the amputations, but the infections that go unnoticed because of the numbness. 'We'll address that as we find out more.' So I guess I need to just relax there and wait and see what is going on.

Today the hives are much better. My ears are about normal, my eye is definitely much better and the welts are definitely lighter in color and do not itch. YEAH!! I will go to the cardiologist tomorrow and see what they think and what I will need to do about the meds. Most likely at that point I will be set up with cardio rehab and begin the process of coming back a bit more in my recovery.

I am feeling much better as you may have noticed by the tags I've offered. It takes my mind off things and keeps me from climbing the walls with boredom. Funny thing about that is the folks that rush here to request one almost as fast as I post it, yet have not once commented on any other post. Not bothered to wish me well with my health, with my recovery. Nothing. I've also received numerous emails from folks letting me know they've posted. NO THEY ARE NOT PRIVATE. These are blogs I've subscribed to as well as became a follower, yet they insist on sending me an email telling me they've posted and yet have not bothered to stop by and say hi. To find out how I'm doing, nothing. IT IS NOT about COMMENTS. It's about human nature, how some folks are, how inconsiderate actions are. And yes, how I've noticed. I've attempted to keep up with commenting on other blogs. Maybe not on each entry as I may get a bit behind and read two the same day etc, but I think I've been damn good and letting people know I'm here and I'm reading. That I care. It amazes me at some who do not care about me or what is going on, they just care about the damn tag or that I stop by their blog. Will I stop making tags for those folks? Will I stop visiting the other blogs? Probably not. It's not my nature, like I said it's not about the comments. But be damn sure I may be sick, but I notice. I think it is extremely rude. It says a so much about a person and the respect I may have had for you is really diminishing if it hasn't disappeared completely. Will they ever know I said any of this? Nope as I don't think they bother to read any entry, including the tag ones, they just request one or move on completely with all entries. For those of you who do comment and show support always, I am forever thankful and I do so appreciate you.

Hugs

~d