Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Heeeeeeeeeeeey ... yeap a post from me. I want to start by saying I am so sorry that I've not been around. I could list a bunch of half assed excuses but truth is I've not had the desire. I don't feel great physically or mentally. I want to be strong and positive but it doesn't always go that way. I've had several feel sorry for me days. Many a days that I cried for hours on end. Breakdowns like I'm not use to.
I have my additional surgery scheduled for March 10. I will most likely be in the hospital about a week. Though no bones will be broke for this bypass more organs will be moved so the surgery is a bit longer then my heart bypass but recovery should be faster. Let's hope!! Let's also hope this works. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired!!!
Once my recovery is on it's way and I'm home I will most likely look into talking to someone... maybe a shrink.. who knows. I just know I can't ride these emotions all the time. I can't control them and since I can't I need to understand them.
Work has been ok. I actually think it's been good for my head. Seeing friends and being up and out. Three times a week after work I go right to rehab. Though it can be painful most times it is a good work out pain. My foot does cause me some distress and makes some things impossible to do but I fight through it. Sometimes with tears sometimes without. It's good tho :)
Last week the weather here broke. The temps were in the high 40's and we had a massive melt down. The above a neighbors backyard. I loved the way the fog lingered. I love the spooky effect. I also took a ride to a local park. The ice and broken up in the creek and it once the blockage broke way the water, ice, and tree branches moved through at great speed. I took a video that blurred in places but I can't figure out how to get it into blogger. Pisses me off. GRRRR If you're interested stop by YouTube to see it. Meltdown If you know how to embed, HELP!
LOL This is kind of how I've felt the past couple weeks... all mixed up and moving out of control. Hope everyone is doing good and I do hope you'll say a couple prayers... I'm extremely anxious over this.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Here's my hints: I'm still blonde, I love to cook, and I love gardening.