~ Elfin ~

My niece stopped over Sunday and picked me up to take me to her Mom's (my sister's).   Yeap, still not allowed to drive :(   Eight weeks is next week so keep your fingers crossed.   They were making Christmas cookies and preparing to watch the Buffalo Bills blow yet another game.  Good gaawd maybe I jinxed them way back when they were 4-0.  Either way they've laid a huge egg and now are the laughing stock of the league... ok maybe not that bad but.......  Sunday was fun.  Both Gage and Bug were having fun being in the Christmas spirit.  Bug, once again had to check on me several times to make sure I was ok.   I do think once I pulled out the camera she let out a sigh of relief.  'Aunt Donna is back.'   LOL 

I went to bed last night as the snow fell.  They were calling for a rough drive this morning.  I was thrilled I didn't have to get up for work and my sister prayed for a snow day.  It's not just the kids that hope for schools to be closed because of the weather.   She wasn't that lucky.  There is snow out there and they are stating now that the temps went up we could get freezing rain.  We'll see.  Just need to make sure I get to the hospital as planned.

::sigh:: speaking of the hospital.  I am scared to death.  I know I've been through some tough things and this should be the easy part, but trust me I am still nervous and scared.   So many things go through your head.  I was feeling very confident that I'd be home tonight, but a visit to my primary doctor yesterday said otherwise.  I had to visit him to get clearance after all my tests.  He didn't want me thinking I'd be home and then be disappointed if I wasn't.  He didn't feel it would be the procedure itself.  He thinks that will be fine and will fix the issues with my foot.  He just feels that since I'm not having it done until 3 in the afternoon they may keep me overnight.  I guess going in thinking that is probably better.  Does make me feel better or make me happy, but I'm preparing for the stay.   If you don't hear from me later give me a day or so......  

I do hope this works.  I'm in some pain and it is extremely uncomfortable.  No position is good.  Laying, sitting, standing.  I can't do any for any length of time.  Sitting at the computer can be brutal.  I've tried to stay current with entries but it never seems to be possible to sit and read all... forgive me.  With any luck at all this will fix the issues and allow me to sleep an night without constantly waking up and having to get up to'walk it off.'  Hopefully I can walk without a limp and actually get some much needed exercise in.  Taking a few steps and then having a pain and tired feeling in my leg is frustrating as all get out.  I feel like I'm carrying a good 70 pounds of dead weight.  Sitting, feet up or feet down, not happening.  My foot and lower leg throb within minutes.  I pray this works. 

Well, off to get a shower and pack a bag.  I do hope I'm home this evening but if you don't hear from me expect an update tomorrow.  My sister has been blogging and she may update, not real sure but you could stop by anyway :::giggle:::

Hugs to you all and again thank your for your friendship, love and support.  The prayers and good vibes are also so appreciated. 

~d

~ Thankful ~

 Wow!  Yes I have so much to be thankful for.  In reality I do every year, I think we all do.  This year however I was given a second chance at life.  I am not sure what I've done so good in my life that I deserve that second chance, but I was given it.  Rest assured I am thankful for it and will be doing some major changes in my life to show my gratefulness.  It's not every day you cheat death.  Someone was most definitely watching out for me.  By all accounts I should not be here.   The pain started on Friday and I did not go to the hospital until Sunday.  On Monday as they did tests they found three arteries blocked.  A triple bypass in order.  I was lost on the table yet the Doctor brought me back.   I believe in God and do think he saved me that day.  I also believe my sister was there too.  I saw no bright light, flowing gown, and I heard no voices (but my sons) but I know she was there.  She was telling me to stop trying follow her  ::grin::

My son.  OMG!  How lucky I am to have a child so mature and responsible.  I've known that along time and have been proud of him for years.  His strength and compassion that he showed during my time of need was incredible.  He is still watching out for me and every day shows a love that not many are privileged to have with their child.  Unconditional.  Again, what I've done in my life that was so good that I deserve him is beyond me but I am thankful.

My family.  Standing by me, pushing me to get better.  Doing what they can to make the recovery that much easier.  Friends have been there too.  In real life and online.  Over and over again letting me know  I mean something to them.  A wonderful feeling that makes me feel special.  Loved.  Thankful again.

I had a list, a long list, but decided this year I am thankful for everything and a list isn't needed.  I have my second chance and will do some soul searching for self improvement.  A little more caring, be kinder, more helpful.  All things that I need to do to show how thankful I am. 

I want to wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving.  Let you know I am thankful for you too!  Each of you are very special to me.   Enjoy your day no matter what your plans are.  Find the goodness and live happily. 

Hugs

~d

~ Short and Sweet ~

I have so much I could say, and no doubt will in the coming weeks.  Might even share some pictures of my Frankenstein like chest.  Yeah, you know, those nah sayers.  Pttuuee much more important things to worry about in life.

I did want to come by real quick and thank everyone for the support, well wishes, and love.  It's appreciated.  So very much appreciated.  The short of it....  I went to my sisters on Halloween to get pics of Bug and Gage.... a sweet pirate and pretty guesome skeleton.  A HillBilly was there along with the green giant and Elvis.  Yes I swear this was all BEFORE going to the hospital. 

I left somewhat early thinking I would work on the pictures and post, but I just didn't feel right.  Indigestion.  I burped and got relief so nothing out of the ordinary to think it wasn't.  Not right then.  It just got worse and different things hurt.  I told my sister she needed to take me to ER, something was very very wrong. 

Things went rather quickly from there.  Nothing like showing up saying you feel like you're having a heart attack and your heart beat is over 150 a minute.  Many many tests, and it was determined by the enzimes that I infact had a heart attack.  We thought it would be as simple as a stint being put in.  Not my luck.  I had triple bypass and to be very frank and honest I am very lucky to be here today.

My Dr's were great.  My heart surgeon, one of the best.  When he came out after surgery and met with my family he asked by show of hands who smoked.  Some raised their hands, and he stated 'good, you'll keep me in business.'   Some may not find that funny but I do.  Straight forward and to the point.  And so very true.

I remember bits and pieces and will elaborate more at a later time, but let me tell you I don't know what I did so good to deserve a son like I have, but damn straight I am lucky.  He stood up and batted the ball out of the park.  I will always remember the look on his face, the tears, and him telling me 'Mom, I still need you.'  That will keep me plowing forward and changing the things I need to change.

Love you all, and again thank you so much for all the support and love you've shown.  It's gonna be awhile and I am taking it easy.............. rest assured YOU WILL see those halloween shots... and some comparisons between the new and old camera.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and one more thing...  I came back on line this weekend to over 500 pieces of mail.  A ton just got deleted, so if you sent something that needed a reply please email again.   One mail I did see though was from Vish....   they did get my journal over here.  I have the link but have not really gone to see what actually came and what didn't.  All in do time.

Hugs
~d